Aqua Teen Hunger Force Fan-Fiction By Drake Episode Title: "Meatwad’s Journey" - Scene 1 The show starts the traditional way, with Dr. Weird’s lab. Dr. Weird: Gentleman! Behold, I give you The Merwieler! The door opens and reveals a creature with a rottwieler’s front half and the back half of a fish. The creature then bites Steve’s leg off, and proceeds to flop into the ocean with it. Steve screams and bleeds while he hops around on one foot. Dr. Weird laughs his evil laugh and the opening theme song starts. - Scene 2 Opens with Master Shake watching TV in the living room, Master Shake is watching an old Sci-Fi B movie with rockets in space, and Meatwad is playing with Dewey (the paper towel roll) and this is annoying shake. Shake: Hey Meatwad, why don’t you and your, little friend, go play in your room, or better yet, go play in traffic. Meatwad: I can’t go in my room, Boxy Brown (the box) said he needs to spend some ‘quality time’ with Vanessa (the apple core), and that he’s getting a ‘sensual message with happy ending’, and that if I come knockin’, he gona bust my head open. And Dewey wants to play here, so he can see the rockets on the TV. Shake: Does He? Meatwad: Oh yea, Dewey likes the rockets see, he used to be an astronaut before he went to work on the Super Train, but NASO (mispronounced by Meatwad) kicked him out for having a bum knee. Shake: Well why didn’t you say something earlier? How about I give you and Dewey free rides in my rocket ship? Meatwad: You have a Rocketship? Shake: Oh yea Meatwad, I fly it all the time, and I go up into space, and it’s a lot of fun there. Meatwad: Really? Shake: Oh yea, I mean, would I lie to you? Meatwad: Yes. Shake: I mean, have I ever lied to you? Meatwad: Yes. Shake: I challenge you to name one time. Meatwad: Just last week you made me eat a bowl of firecrackers in buns and said they were little hot dogs, and then you made me swallow a lit match because you said you forgot to cook the hot dogs... (Meatwad is interrupted by Shake.) Shake: But no, this is different, see, I just want what’s best for Dewey, and since he’s been in space before, I thought he would like to go, again. Meatwad: So where it at? Shake: Where what at? Meatwad: Your rocketship? Shake: Oh yea, my rocket, let me go get it. Shake leaves the house via the front door, and he can be heard making straining noises and dragging something. - Scene 3 This scene opens outside of the house, and Shake has an old metal trashcan turned over upside down on the lawn. It has cardboard fins attached to it, and a highway cone duct taped to the top. There are visible drag marks in the yard leading to behind Carl’s house, indicating he stole the trashcan from Carl. Shake: Come on out, it’s ready. Meatwad rolls out carrying Dewey. Meatwad: Man, this don’t look like no rocket ship, this is a trashcan. Shake: No, No, this is a rocket ship, NASO made it look like a trashcan so that, (pause) no one would steal it. It’s a secrete prototype. Meatwad: No, Shake, that’s a trashcan, I may be dumb, but I’m not that dumb. Shake takes a can of red spray paint and writes NASO on the side of the can. Shake: Look Meatwad, would a trashcan say NASO on it? Meatwad: I guess not, yea, Dewey says "you’re right that’s definitely a rocket." Shake pushes the rocket over on its side so Meatwad can get in. Shake: Go ahead, climb aboard, it’s perfectly safe, I promise. Meatwad: Na-hu, No way, Frylock said not to trust you, and never to climb into something you made, especially if you say it’s safe. Shake: But didn’t Frylock also say I was a Genius? Meatwad: No, he said you were an Evil Genius, without the Genius part. Shake: I didn’t make it, NASO did, now come on, get in, you’ll like it, I promise, have I ever broken a promise? Meatwad: Yea, just last week you were making me clean out the garbage disposal, and you promised not to turn it on, and you did... (Meatwad is interrupted by Shake) Shake: I meant recently, like today, why you gotta always be draggin up ancient history, what’s done is done and... Just get in the ship. Meatwad looks at the rocket, and looks at Dewey, then looks at the rocket again, and slowly rolls in. Shake: Ok, Meatwad, I just gota put the hatch cover on. Shake puts the cover on the can, and duct-tapes it so that Meatwad can’t get out. Shake: Are you ready for lift off? Meatwad is banging on the can to get out. Meatwad: Man let me outa here, it’s dark, and I’m scared, and this rocket smells bad, it smells like Carl. Shake Laughs Histaricaly Shake: Dumbass. 3-2-1, we have liftoff. Shake pushes the can very hard using his body, into the street. - Scene 4 All through this part you can hear Meatwad yelling as the can begins to roll down hill, down the street, and through traffic. He rolls slowly at first, then he starts to pick up speed. He hit several cars, and stop signs, and fire hydrants. Each time he hits something you can hear him make sounds suggesting that it hurt. He finally rolls to a stop in an intersection. After a brief pause: Meatwad: Thank god that’s over. Just then, the school bus (the bus of the undead from the first season) hits the trashcan very hard, sending it flying down an even busier road at an even faster rate of speed. This time rather then bouncing and just rolling, the trash can tumbles end to end as it bounces off cars and trucks. After hitting a semi he is bounced into the hood and into the windshield of Carl’s "2 Wicked" Car. The trashcan is lodged into the glass, but Meatwad slung out of the can in midair into and skids along the asphalt getting run over by many more cars. Meatwad comes to rest just short of the edge of the road on a tall cliff above the ocean. He is bruised, and has knots on his ‘head’, and has a large chrome bumper sticking out of him. He breathes a sigh of relief, and just then Dewey bounces by and goes off the cliff into the Ocean. Meatwad: Nooo!!! Don’t worry Dewey, I’ll save you! And like a true Dumbass, Meatwad rolls himself off the cliff, once again screaming, and hitting trees and drain pipes on the way down. Once Meatwad gets to the bottom he hits he water hard, with the unpleasant clap sound a belly flop makes. He sees, Dewey bobbing around at the top. He starts swimming towards him and notices the Merwieler (from the beginning of the show) is trying to beat him to Dewey. He manages to out swim the Merwieler and grab Dewey, that angers the Dog-Fish and then it bites Meatwad, hard. Scene Ends Here. - Scene 5 You hear a loud knocking on the door, and Shake is watching TV, but does not answer the door. Banging gets louder. Carl: Come out here you little sobs, I know you’re in there. Frylock floats in from the back and answers the door. Frylock: What seems to be the matter Carl? The camera then shifts outside to show Carl’s car, with the trashcan rocket still lodged in the windshield. You can see the trashcan is pretty much destroyed, but you can see NASO spray painted on it, and one broken cardboard fin still hanging on, barely. Carl: I need to talk to you guys, about my freakin trash can, like why it’s not in my yard, and why it’s in my windshield. Frylock looks at shake. Shake looks around nervously and then gets up and walks to the door with where Frylock and Carl are at. Shake: I think it must have been raccoons, they’ve been known to do that. Carl: Yea, that was my egh, (pause) first though, but then I couldn’t help but notice the egh, (pause) trail of garbage and friggin drag-marks leading right to your house. Frylock: Shake, where is Meatwad? Shake: Yea, Meatwad, said he was going to push the can to the corner and he’d be right back, I tried to stop him but he wouldn’t listen. Carl: Oh yea, I saw the ugh Meat Man, he was riding in my trashcan until it hit my car, and I think he’s probably in the grill of a truck right now. You now see Meatwad roll very slowly in, with Dewey, he is battered beyond recognition, he still has the chrome bumper sticking out of him, but now he has a tree branch sticking out and a large dog bite with a missing hunk of meat, and he is soaking wet. Frylock: Oh Meatwad, I’m so glad you’re here, are you alright? Carl: Oh, good, now your all here together and... (Frylock interrupts him.) Frylock: Shake, you are very lucky that no one got killed. Carl: Ugh, Yet! Why don’t you three wait right here, I’m going to go inside and get my shotgun. Carl walks off screen. Meatwad begins talking in a voice that is fast but shows he is very injured. Meatwad: Shake said he had a rocket ship, but it wasn’t a rocket, and I got hit by a semi, and bit by a fish-dog in the ocean, and Dewey almost drowned. Frylock pauses for a second. Frylock: Did you say an animal that was part dog and part fish, bit you? Meatwad: Yea sir, and I don’t think he’s had all his shots either. Frylock: Do you know what this means? It could be a new species! And I could be the one who discovers it, Quick to the Danger Cart! - Scene 6 This scene opens on the road with Meatwad pulling the danger cart with Frylock and Master Shake riding aboard. Meatwad is still all battered, with the bumper, the tree branch, and the dog-bite. The scene then skips ahead to the team at the shore. Frylock and Meatwad are looking in the water for the Merwieler, while shake sets down in the shade next to the danger cart. Frylock: I give up, the chances of my finding an extremely rare and endangered ocean dwelling life form from the shore are so remotely slim that... (He is interrupted by Meatwad) Meatwad: Found it. Frylock: What? (Excited) Frylock and Shake come running up. Frylock: Poor little guy, must have beached himself here and can’t get back out to sea. Shake: It is evil, and you must kill it. Frylock: It’s just a puppy Shake: It’s the anti-Christ, hit it with your eye lasers. Frylock: No it’s cute, and... Frylock reaches down to pet it and it bites his French Fry arm. Frylock: Dam mutt! Frylock blast him with his laser eyes. - Scene 7 The last scene is a quick glimpse of Carl alone with a shotgun at the Teen’s house. Carl: Hey guy’s, I’m back. I hope you waited for me. I got a present for you... - Roll Credits |